Posted by karen_kay on June 3, 2004, at 9:51:32
In reply to Re: did someone say naked? » karen_kay, posted by Scott in Vermont on June 3, 2004, at 8:27:22
of course getting drunk and naked is ranked as one of my funnest things to do. it merely takes a suggestion of "karen, get naked and start the revolution" to have me swimming naked in the pool. nevermind that there was no 'revolution' only a drunk, naked girl in the pool (and that was just last weekend). and sometimes it doesn't even take liquor. my canadian wife and i have discussed (on several occassions) our "meeting" which would consist of running naked through the streets. i'm easily persuaded see, if someone dares me to take my clothes off (nevermind the policemen around the corner), off they come. but, the suggestion must be there. oh dear, and the times i've embarrassed my sweet mother with my nakedness. but, it was good for business, though i awoke with a stranger's name on my rear. apparently i was having a great time, and the pictures proved it, but i remember very little. i think in the past few years, the phrase i've heard from my mother the most (aside from 'did i stutter?') is 'karen kay, put your clothes on'. i'm glad she loves me. (oh, and my wife is very similar as well. she has her own 'naked stories' that i wish she would include in the conversation. you must meet my wife (but not before i do of course) if this is going to work.
now, i'm not even sure where vermont is, but it sounds lovely. geography isn't my strong suit. i don't know how far of a drive you are looking at, but your efforts will be rewarded. i can cook (when prompted to), do laundry, housework, brush a dog (are children's grooming needs similar? or at their ages, aren't they old enough to bathe themselves?), talk crap like no one's business, and i have even been known to be pleasant and soothing on very rare occassions. but, how could i buy you lunch? i have no money. should i ask my boyfriend for some money, so i can buy scott lunch because he's coming to get me? for some reason, i don't think he'd be handing over the cash (but again, i could be wrong). i suppose i could try to steal you a sandwhich from a gas station. would that be good enough for you?
so were you joking about 'our' home and 'our' garden? if not, is it possible for you to put my half (quarter? just how many people will be living there?) up for sale, so i can buy you lunch and something nice for myself? will it be enough to buy me a pony? is that a possibility, to sell my portion of 'our' home, so i can finally get that pony i've always wanted?
you can play banjo, but jon can play better? can i get his number when i move into 'our' home? better yet, can jon move in too?
i consulted the atlas and it appears that vermont is probably further than 10 hours away (but, reading maps isn't my strong suit). but, when i tried to measure the distance with my fingers, i found it is only about 80 miles away. i think i have something wrong with my measuring capabilities.
how did you know i bump my head often? i especially hate low ceilings with ceiling fans. that's a potential disaster in the making. why in the world would someone install a ceiling fan on a low ceiling anyway? were they not thinking about tall people? (off subject, but not really... i choose not to wear hats (other than the fact that they make me look funny) because if i wear a baseball cap i often find i am ducking down because i think it's a low ceiling, rather than the bill (is that right?) of the hat. so, not only do they look stupid on me, they also make me look stupid since i'm always ducking for no apparent reason.)
oh, and i won't wear a helmet. never! i'll suffer a head injury from hitting a cabinet before resorting to wearing a helmet most of my life. that's a chance i'll have to take.
and if you don't mind that i don't sing well, i'll sing. but, when you laugh at me, it'll cause me to laugh at me too. so, i won't accomplish much singing, only laughing and i can find all sorts of things about myself to laugh at without using singing as an excuse. so, wouldn't it be more enjoyable to laugh at someone else singing, that way we can share the fun and still be entertained?
can you jump over fires? my friends and i used to have parties out in the woods and by the end of the night, we'd be jumping over fires, burning the benches to keep the fire going and even once threw the host's guitar in the fire. he was angry, but he should have known it's dangerous to keep any type of wood that close to the fire, especially when wood is running low.
and about fires.... all this talk caused me to dream last night i was running from the police (i haven't a clue why, i didn't do anything wrong but my first instinct is to run) and they set my arm on fire! now i'm dreaming about fire. (and you said you'd keep me away from the fire. that's sweet (i think?). i didn't know you cared. but, will you keep the police away if they try to set my arm on fire?
about 'YOUR' car. you sound like my boyfriend now. this will be something we have to resolve in the future. i assure you i wouldn't steal 'YOUR' car and run away to canada.
but, this does start the discussion.... how do i know that when you are angry i wouldn't hear about 'your' home or 'your' children (wait, if not *legally* married, then i wouldn't have any rights to the children, correct? so, i couldn't say, sell them on e-bay if i needed money?). i'm willing to share my suitcase and clothing with you. not to mention my charming personality, my work ethic, and my attention and affection. so, why not 'our' car? you wouldn't have to sign anything, therefore it wouldn't be legal. and if i did steal 'our' car, you could still report me (you wouldn't do that though, would you?). so, how about we change the wording just a bit and call it 'our' car? to make me feel better about things? pretty please?
i like the open relationship idea. however, would i have a voice in your options? would i be able to say 'now scott, i don't approve of her or him.' and if i did say that, would you listen? and if you istened, would you heed my advice? and just how many relationships are we talking about here? and could i still pretend to be committed to you, even though you know i'm not. like, if jon was sitting on the couch naked, would you allow me to say 'oh, he's dusting' and go along with it, even though we both know he's not? i do need an answer for this one because it's very important to me to make the person i'm in a relationship with feel as if we are exclusive, even when we both know that isn't true.
ok, what if i was willing to share the pony? just a little bit. like, others could feed and groom the pony, but not ride the pony? and if i was riding a pony, could i wear riding gear? i may even make an exception to the helmet rule, just because they look so darn cute on pony riders. (oh, and does a pony run really fast?)
you don't have a mail carrier? when you go to get your mail, do you stop and talk to the person working, to make it feel almost as if you do have a mail carrier? i would have to bring my mail carrier with me. if she won't come willingly (how could she not? i think i could talk her into it) i may have to use force. would that upset you?
now, the imprtant question.... about your friends. say i did find one (or 6) of your friends acceptable and 'made good on my flirtations' would you and your friend(s) compare notes? and what if i decided i like one (or 3) of your friends better (in bed), but still wanted to live with you? would sex be a big issue? would you be jealous? is it our bed or your bed? if it's our bed, is there a problem with me entertaining your friends there, but not you? and what if you are sleeping and i want to entertain one of your friends (or 6)? would you get up and leave, so i could use the bed? or would you be angry? and if you ewre angry, would you still just get up and leave? and would you be angry at me or your friend (s)?
now, i must warn you of some of my 'bad' sides. i don't like being told no, and will do everything to avoid it. for the first few years, sex and affection works. after that, i tend to move on to kissing feet and begging. once that works no more, i have been known to lay on the floor in a ball until i get my way (usually chinese food or to watch something on tv, though in this case it could be the car). will this work? will this be a problem? how would you handle this situation?
and this sounds too good to be true. why aren't more people jumping in to move to vermont? sheesh! maybe some people wouldn't know a good thing if they read it on babble?
poster:karen_kay
thread:349363
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040602/msgs/353331.html