Posted by Kath on April 12, 2008, at 21:35:05
In reply to Re: when is it abuse?, posted by shangrila7 on April 5, 2008, at 17:30:16
Big DITTO to what BiPolarLen said hunnee.
PLEASE get help. Do you have a women's shelter near you. Not for you to go there, but for you to have someone IRL to HEAR you.
If you have a printer & can print out your post, please do so & put it safely in your purse & do NOT tell him it's there.
He is being scandalously abusive. He fits "abusive partner" to a TEE.
That he would say to a child "she's a good mommy but a bad wife" is SO sick I can't imagine it.
Kids should NOT be talke to about adult stuff.
If not for your own sake, I'd say do NOT stay with him for the sake of your daughter.
Would you want her to live with someone like that & be treated like that when she grows up? I bet not. If so, please know (said very kindly) that you are teaching her that this is the way women get treated & that it's OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
Please reach out for help IRL.
I actually wonder whether or not you are physically safe with this person (I certainly don't think he deserves the word "man" in the same sentence as him!)
You are CERTAINLY not emotionally safe with him.YES - this is DEFINITELY abuse hun.
You do NOT deserve to be treated like this. Nobody does. Children deserve to never see or hear things like this.
He is trying to make you think that you are at fault. He is very ill, in my opinion.
Please keep us posted, okay?
I care about you. I don't even know you & I care about you probably more than he could ever dream about truly caring about you. He is ill.
Please let us know how you are.
love, Kath ((((((((((((((((you)))))))))))))))))
PS - PLEASE DO NOT tell him you posted on a group online. Please do NOT tell him you are thinking about leaving or getting help. He is used to having control over you & when that pattern is in danger of being broken, he might react VERY strongly. Please DO take this seriously. You have to keep yourself & your daughter safe.
If he will throw a remote at you (or in your direction) he will not hesitate to be violent with you.Please resist the temptation to say, "Well I'm getting help. I have friends online who say..." or anything like that.
Pl check back in. I'm worried about you.
Kath
poster:Kath
thread:742706
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20071110/msgs/822977.html