Posted by DannaB on December 21, 2006, at 23:40:24
In reply to Re: Don't know how to have a healthy relationship » DannaB, posted by LJRen on December 21, 2006, at 9:38:41
Thanks very much for your kind and thoughtful response. I liked what you said about asking twice is enough to ask. Sometimes I am too persistent ;)
I think one thing that is really hard for me is that I am high strung. The reason I am high strung is that my mother is extremely high strung and was constantly yelling at us kids and worrying about x, y and z. Therefore, it is *very* hard for me to relax. Sometimes I think people won't want to be around me because of it. I have made progress, but I think my nerves have been "sensitized" and maybe I'll always be stressed out and tense (to a degree) :(
It's also very hard for me to trust anyone fully and also to feel like I'm being heard (even if I am) because it was so hard to be heard at home and my boundaries were so violated. And I have a lot of anger inside that I try to suppress, but I'm always scared it will come out and that will mean I'm a bad person.
Lastly, it's hard for me to feel lovable. Somehow feeling unlovable seems to drive people away.
poster:DannaB
thread:714409
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/715596.html