Posted by Gabbi~G~ on November 11, 2006, at 11:26:28
In reply to staying away is getting harder to do, posted by LJRen on November 6, 2006, at 23:22:03
Oh Gosh, I wish I'd read this earlier.
I've gone through that twice, and it's excruciating.
It feels like the one little bright spot, the hand to hold, is just gone, and it's (obviously for people like us) agonizing, and a little humiliating. I remember no matter where I was just waiting to come home, to see if maybe he'd written because he missed me, because it's been wow, 26 hours since I last wrote.. and I'm not even kidding!
And somehow, for me anyway, being asked to stop made it worse, at some points I may have gone for a month without writing anyway, but this ..ugh.I honestly thought maybe I could take something that would just make me sleep all the time and then I could stand it.
I've been through it twice, and both times, I didn't know it, I was depressed, when the depression lifted I thought "Omygod, where the hell was my brain at????"
Because depression can be so insidious that way, you don't 'feel' the small things that get other people through the day, you know? Like how good a bath can feel, or how nice something smells, or reading a good book, there's just that ONE person who somehow manages to temporarily cut through the gloom..
You can do it, but for the first while it's like a junkie waiting for a fix, if you can get through that period, it will be okay. Let me know if I can help, this is a situation I can really relate to.
poster:Gabbi~G~
thread:701107
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/702545.html