Posted by allisonross on November 22, 2005, at 10:03:26
Divorced after 31 years of abuse. Let the ex live with me for 4 years afterwards (abandonment issues). It's a scary thing to know that one would rather live with an abuser, than be alone (that's how I grew up, it was what I knew). But that was the truth.
He left 5 months ago, and I have been doing (amazingly enough) quite well. My t said it "blew his mind how I overcame pain and what a happy person I am."
Now the thing that makes me nauseous. I found out Sunday that he has a girlfriend. I am trying NOT to think about it. It makes me feel so betrayed.
Why? Because first, he abuses me, then he leaves me, and behaves like I never existed (I e-mailed him a few times, and he wouldn't respond, because he said he had to "get on with his life." That made no sense to me; I was asking some technical questions, that only he could answer.
NOW, I understand what he meant by that comment. He has a girlfriend. She is 51 and never been married. All of my friends say what I was thinking: Wonder what is wrong with her...what is her story, because MOST people that age have been married.
arrrghhhh...it makes me physically ill. I know (or hope) that I will eventually get over obsessing about it I guess I'd like to find a way to torture/punish him for what he put me through, which is healthy--
As long as I (mwahhhhh, lol) don't act on it!!
Hold me back, LOL
Any comments/advice thougts will be cherished and much appreciated. Smiles, Ally (Now, where is that knife?)
poster:allisonross
thread:581203
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20051031/msgs/581203.html