Posted by Tamar on November 9, 2005, at 19:20:02
In reply to just venting...no need to reply ukay:), posted by alesta on November 9, 2005, at 10:44:53
Gosh, I’m not surprised you’re angry and confused. You have a lot going on right now. I was curious about a couple of things…
You said:
> it is not his fault
and:
> he humiliates me
So I’m wondering: if it’s not his fault, whose fault is it? Is it *your* fault he humiliates you? I don’t think so…
The other thing I wondered about was where you said:
> i broke up with him yesterday and then got back together again. i need more self-control
You know, the word self-control wasn’t the word I was expecting to see there. Self-esteem, maybe. Or self-love. But there’s something about the word self-control… I get the impression that you feel out of control with the situation. And that’s natural in the circumstances. But it sounds as if you’re being very hard on yourself about it.
I think it’s common for women in abusive relationships to feel very confused about what they want. And no doubt there are things about this man you find very appealing, or you simply wouldn’t go back to him.
Do you believe it is possible to find those appealing qualities in a man who is nice to you?
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:577088
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20051031/msgs/577223.html