Posted by sunny10 on March 31, 2005, at 9:29:52
In reply to Incapable of love?, posted by Shy_Girl on March 30, 2005, at 19:17:43
If you are comfortable being on your own then there's nothing wrong with you. Eveyone is different; you don't have to conform to someone else's idea of "normal" if you are comfortable within yourself.
If you ever feel lonely, though, maybe you'll want to look into why you feel you "can't form attachments". Thoughts like "relationships aren't worth the trouble and pain", or "I could really love this person if...", or a sigh, "this is my life; I'll get used to it" would all point to a fear of "involvement" that do you need/want a relationship in some respect, but not everyone needs/wants a partner. Those people don't have thoughts like that. Although they do wonder if other people think they are not normal...
I guess what I'm trying to say is that no one is "normal"... we all react to different situations in different ways, we all have different ideas of what loneliness is vs alone-ness. The most important thing for you is to figure out what YOUR ideas of loneliness vs alone-ness are.
The physical aspects of arousal and completion do very important things within your body and brain to keep you healthy. I would be more concerned if you had said you were asexual. Choosing to be alone is not an unhealthy choice for everyone. It's only unhealthy for those who are burying a need/desire beneath fear.
Hope my opinion on the matter helps... as usual, use what you like and feel free to throw away the rest... In the long run, your opinion is the one that matters.
-sunny10
poster:sunny10
thread:477969
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20050325/msgs/478083.html