Posted by 64bowtie on November 28, 2004, at 2:39:05
In reply to He hit me, posted by vwoolf on November 21, 2004, at 13:23:48
#1. Get someone els involved, NOW! I have worked as a couselor of court appointed chemical/person abusers. Please listen and understand what I say. You will not be betraying the relationship. Who cares if you do now. He already just did!!!
#2. Establish boundaries --- because you are worth it!!! You are worth more than being his punching bag!
#3. He has crossed the line from coercion into violence as a conflict resolution technique. The best of us are sometimes terrible at conflict resolution. Seems strange since we average 20 minor to major conflicts every day... e.g. "Do I buy the 1% milk that's cheaper or the 2% that tastes better...?". He cannot continue with you in his life without intervention via therapy and counseling.
#4. If it happnes again, file an estople action (restraining order) so you are on record. No matter how much longer you are together, he will have to reckon with his actions, change his ways, or go to jail! Please hear that I feel deeply for you and your situation. He is a separate person from you no matter how much family-enmeshment has taken place. You can love him deeply, and even deeper if you help get some help for himself.
Rod
poster:64bowtie
thread:418636
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041118/msgs/421181.html