Psycho-Babble Relationships | about interpersonal relationships | Framed
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would like advice from my babble buddies

Posted by JenStar on November 8, 2004, at 12:39:16

hi all,
I would like some advice from the group. I've posted similar queries before, but hopefully you can be patient with me & offer your help again.

Here's my situation: A woman I know is trying to become very "best" friends with me. She calls all the time, gives me gifts. call her much less frequently, and when I do, I'm cooler and don't make plans to get together. I hoped she'd get the message that I wasn't interested in being her great best friend, but more of a once-in-a-while luncheon-catch-up friend.

But she's not getting it. She keeps calling and leaving long and sort of desperate messages, saying "I miss you sooo much" and "let's get together soon," in a wistful way. When we DO get together she's overly clingly and tries to push the friendship too fast.

I don't like this person and I don't want to be her friend. I feel horrible saying that HERE and would feel worse saying it to HER. But I can't deal with this relentless invasive calling from her! I feel mean. But I just don't want to hang out with her.

Do I need to come out and SAY this to her? (aarrrggghhh!) Should I just keep being distant and hope that with time she'll get it?

What would you do?

thanks!
JenStar


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Psycho-Babble Relationships | Framed

poster:JenStar thread:413307
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041106/msgs/413307.html