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Re: Wanting to terminate, again » Tabitha

Posted by Dinah on July 30, 2012, at 11:14:27

In reply to Re: Wanting to terminate, again » Willful, posted by Tabitha on July 29, 2012, at 12:37:48

> But obviously I've been reluctant to break it off. Mostly out of fear that without her, I'd start burdening others around me with my problems and worries.

Boy, do I identify with this. That's why I suggested a break instead of a Termination with a capital T. Once you're away from the situation, you can better assess whether *not* having her in your life is causing a problem, or if you've developed enough of a support network and internal strength to manage without her. When you're in the middle of it, fear about the future can cloud the decision making process. If you find you are using your friends and family as a therapist, and you need that in your life, you can return to her or to someone new. If you find you manage quite well without her, you can agree not to schedule any future appointments unless needed - or maybe see her for a few sessions to review your progress.

I do understand that fear. I think if my parents had had a therapist, I'd have been a lot better off and their relationship would have been better off.

Would she let you have a month off?

I think it potentially could be a positive experience, and that you could think of her as helping you to the point where you don't really need her anymore. That the relationship may already have met the original goals.

Do you feel the need to call her between sessions when things are really bad? I find that very telling with my therapist. Calling his is no longer something that occurs to me, or if it does, I shrug and ask myself what he could do anyway. Then take a Risperdal.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:1022225
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20120518/msgs/1022423.html