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Re: Wanting to terminate, again

Posted by Willful on July 31, 2012, at 15:13:49

In reply to Re: Wanting to terminate, again » Dinah, posted by Tabitha on July 31, 2012, at 11:41:54

This isn't a case of an impulsive gesture, or a need to make a "statement" about anything. It seems as if this is the result of a long-standing evolution of thought and feeling, and as if you've given the relationship many chances, much time and energy, to prove itself necessary.

Nothing is black and white: there's no point at which you're getting nothing from a relationship, at which it's completely clear, with no possible second-guessing, and no possible alternate case for staying. There will always be those things-- but it's really the consideration and thoughtfulness that you've given the question-- and the extent to which this sense has struck with you that should guide your actions, I think.


Your judgment doesn't seem swayed by the feeling of a moment-- or by a reaction to what she does, per se-- that is, you're not acting from resistance, or defiance, or fear. There are reasons not to end therapy. despite the desire to. But there are reasons that justify ending it. I'm not hearing warning signs that this is self-defeating, or nihilistic.

And even if it were-- you'll come to see that in the break. And that, too, will give you information.

If I reached the point that you have, I would follow my judgment and hold to my own perceptions. Of course, she has some points-- and maybe she sees things that need work. Perhaps you'll decide on a new therapy. But you deserve to make judgments and follow them-- to go with your own point of view, not hers.

This can be a provisonal break--a time to review and reevaluate, with the expectation that it may last, but that it may lead to some period of fewer sessions, etc.

But this is your life and your therapy-- not hers. If you're afraid of not seeing her-- try it out-- and if it isn't what you need, then you can find another therapist, or return to her-- with renewed commitment and purpose.


Emsam.
Abilify
Provigil
Rilutek

 

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