Posted by annierose on August 7, 2011, at 11:55:45
After her vacation and my reaction to that, I was finally settling back into therapy and trusting the relationship once again. My weekend was full and I felt okay about me socially. I went to a pool party and actually got in a bathing suit and swam (the fact that it was frickin' hot outside was motivating). I was looking forward to sharing my weekend since rediscovering those loving feelings towards her - that she really did care.
Then BAM.
On Thursday I asked her if she had a time to see me on Tuesday. We are taking our son to camp that afternoon. She offered me 9:40 a.m. I asked her if I could get back to her after talking to my husband --- I wasn't sure when he wanted to leave AND I take an exercise class Tuesday morning @ 8 --- so I would be hot and sweaty (wouldn't have time to go home and change) but I did like the appt time ... gave me the afternoon to get my son ready and load the car, etc.
I didn't have a chance to speak to my husband until Friday nite. I was gone the entire day and evening was full. Saturday MORNING I sent her a text that the time will work, but I might be a little self conscious being in my work out clothes. No reply.
This morning I come out of exercise class and she sent me this text: "I am very sorry that I no longer have the 9:40 available. I do have a 4:40 though, would you prefer that?"
I replied: "Really? That's disappointing. We are taking xyz to camp that afternoon, leaving @ 3. Did you forget you offered the time to me? So 4:40 does not work at all. I got back to you Saturday before noon. It's not like I waited until Monday morning to tell you. I am so hurt."
An hour later she sent this reply: "I am sincerely sorry you are feeling hurt. Goodness knows that was not my intention. We can talk on Monday."I sent this back: "What was your intention? I would never do that (as a business person myself). If a manufacteur rep asked to see me and I gave her a date/time but she didn't get back to me right away, then another rep asked for that same day/time, I would call/text/e-mail rep #1 and letting her know I need an answer. You dismissed me. So hurt. Just when I begin to trust this relationship - BOOM - you remind me not to."
It is me - or were she actions rude? or does that suck? or both?
I think she forgot she offered me that time - or maybe I hope she forgot because that is the only explanation that sits ok with me ... choosing someone else over me intentionally feels a lot worse.Of course, I am now having a hard time wanting to go to my appointment on Monday at all. I am so angry inside.
poster:annierose
thread:993053
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20110706/msgs/993053.html