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Re: Just what Exactly IS wrong with me? (LONG) » Dinah

Posted by Verloren on March 8, 2010, at 9:31:42

In reply to Re: Just what Exactly IS wrong with me? (LONG) » Verloren, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2010, at 0:02:28

>>That I needed to be able to feel that I could say to him that I felt really really bad. That I needed to feel that he would take that as seriously as if I had said I wanted to hurt myself. Because otherwise I'd feel like I needed to feel and act self destructive to have him really understand how bad I was feeling.
>

Wow Dinah,

yeah I totally understand. I think it's something from my childhood of never being able to say, "I feel bad" that makes me feel weird saying it now. Maybe weird is not the right word.

I also wonder if I should ever tell her again how bad I could be. Whenever she speaks of before, she keeps saying how bad off I was. I don't like hearing that. I don't know why but it feels like it was my fault for spiraling downward like that and that she's blaming me. Of course, she'd say that's not true. Still there's a little tug within me each time she references how bad off I was.

I think I actually remember that story. It sounds very familiar but I can't remember where it's from or what it was called. Darn!

-v

 

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