Posted by Dinah on February 27, 2010, at 10:23:26
In reply to Re: Reassurance, posted by annierose on February 26, 2010, at 21:44:41
> I do think it's always okay to ask for reassurance and sometimes they give it and sometimes they don't. Maybe it's part wanting to give us wings.
>
> I remember one particularly painful exchange last year: me asking t: "am I going to be okay?" my therapist reply, "if you want it to be." I think I said to myself, "F you"Annierose, that made me laugh so hard.
You would not believe the negotiations my therapist and I have had about reassurances. He absolutely refused to answer the "okay" question and I absolutely insisted that he answer the question. We ended up arguing the fine points of what his answer would mean, and decided that it would only mean "We are ok, and whatever problems we have, I'm committed to working them with you." Then we expanded it to something like "Life is full of experiences that really aren't ok, but whatever life has in store, I have confidence that you will deal with them, and I will support you in that as much as I can."
But all of that involved negotiations on each word worthy of international treaty negotiations. :) My therapist would say I had missed my perfect career.
poster:Dinah
thread:937900
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100128/msgs/938073.html