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Re: I used to love my T, now I don't...

Posted by Willful on January 24, 2010, at 15:54:49

In reply to I used to love my T, now I don't..., posted by Verloren on January 24, 2010, at 13:22:43

I also want to say that none of us can evaluate what's best-- but I wouldn't even think of ending the relationship with your T without working on these feelings with her.

Transference isn't just positive, there's also negative transference, which usually doesn't manifest itself right away-- but comes after a while, when a T disappoints or frustrates you a lot. So I wouldn't say your transference is over, but rather that you've shifted to a more negative mode. One reason it's important to stick with it, when that happens, is that people disappoint us all the time-- and presumably the important disappointments in your history are a big part of what you might reexperience in a milder and more manageable form with your T-- and then can work through in a more real way.

If your T is still reassuring you that she doesn't intend to end, I would take her word. It would be really unthinkable that she would say that while planning to make up some excuse to do so--especially while you in an intensive treatment at her suggestion.

I got the feeling that you're often very worried about this-- and probably this is part of that sense of not being able to trust anyone-- to be there.

So while I don't really know the situation, my instincts (based on my experience) would be to think it wouldn't be at all good to plan to end things now.

Willful

 

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poster:Willful thread:934868
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20091212/msgs/934877.html