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Re: T says I have poor manners! I am very upset!

Posted by lingonberry on January 5, 2010, at 14:25:49

In reply to T says I have poor manners! I am very upset!, posted by rnny on January 4, 2010, at 16:21:37

Hi rnny,

Sometimes, I also have been pretty rude with my T. I didnt see it because it was, like tetrix sad, so subtle, and also, I had a great investment thinking of myself as very nice and compassionate, and because of that, I had a hidden agenda to not discover my bad behaviour. And sometimes I raised doubts against his approach in a very grumbling way. I thought that I took more responsibility for my behaviour than I actually did at the time. I had issues with speaking up and instead of focusing on my own feelings and needs and talk about them in a proper way I was mad at him for not reading my mind and my anger came out in a subtle way. I was kind of insolent, not so much but nevertheless, quite insolent. I acted in a passive- aggressive way and I had, let me put it this way (LOL), a great reluctance against criticism. I often interpreted what he said like critic. At that time, I havent discovered that there is always an internal conversation going on inside my mind and therefore, Im always reacting on my own thoughts.

My T has never said anything about my manners. He is always very kind, just sits there, and radiates love and compassion. And because of that, my bad behaviour was reflected back to me and i didn´t liked what I saw. By doing that he taught me how to interact with others.

I dont know you and have no clue whats going on in your mind or between you and your T rrny, but I hope you will sort things out very soon. Its always tuff not getting along with T.

Lingonberry

 

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poster:lingonberry thread:932479
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20091212/msgs/932584.html