Posted by maysie on November 13, 2008, at 10:43:54
In reply to Re: 'T' has trouble staying awake, more story, posted by JouezMoi on November 13, 2008, at 5:03:45
I have seen him since June. It was 2x a week for the month after the attempt, now once a week. I know good T's are sometimes like hitting the power-ball. I've seen a couple. I'm a "good patient" just like I was the "good daughter". I've lost my good T's to retirement and other life changes.
I have been vocal about his wiggling to stay awake. Maybe the issue is I do it in a motherly way, like "you are wiggling, are you tired, do you need a nap?"
I should say at $120/hour, this is an insult to me and my reason for being here! (even he said I should say this).
As I said my main issues I thought were the ugly verbal abuse I had heard all my life. Along my way with him I turned over something I thought were nothing, but it turned out to be the memory of a car wreck which nearly killed almost all my family. I think this found memory was not expected by either of us, because he was equally unhappy to find it. My dealing with them has been pretty much him wiggling and listening as I struggle to remember and talk about a car wreck I had blocked, that nearly killed my family when I was 18. As an aside he asked me this past week if I always cried this much, UH WHAT???I hope this doesn't sound to woo-woo, but at 58 years old I want to grow up into the woman I can be. Lively, vibrant, colorful, probably still shy, and agoraphobic, but fully alive. Not the wounded shell I had been all the years my parents were alive to tell me how inadequate I was. I have told him this is my goal many times. I know I have to clean my brain some more to function in that way, but is he capable of helping with this? I think he is a deeply unhappy, rigid man, who can only tolerate a minimum of liveliness. I asked him what gives him pleasure, he said watching his chickens.. I love chickens, but still this is a "HUH" answer.
You all are so nice!
poster:maysie
thread:862737
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081104/msgs/862802.html