Posted by sassyfrancesca on September 18, 2008, at 7:31:00
In reply to Re: T Touching Himself » sassyfrancesca, posted by Wittgensteinz on September 17, 2008, at 17:03:35
> Sassy,
>
> The violations of professionalism are clear - goes without saying. Yes, I do know that ((Witti))
>
> I feel very sorry and sad for you. Thankyou..... This is a man you love and *trust*? Unfortunately, yes.Perhaps you are dependent on him in some ways. Yes, I am. He is the only man in my life (although i sure am trying to meet someone else!)
At the very least you are clearly strongly attached. Yet he is exploiting (abusing?) you, degrading you - what a horrible, selfish thing to do -Yes, selfish......
what a terrible situation to be in. I think you are in a very vulnerable position and I really hope things don't decline further. How can you keep things safe? How can he keep things safe? What obligations does he feel he has to you and your care/treatment?
Hard to say; he actually said last week that he "didn't want to hurt me." duhhhh......
>
> I get the feeling if it weren't for your self-control, things would already have descended into a clearly unethical relationship between you and him (not to say that there haven't already been violations on his part).Yes, it is ironic; I am the client and can behave any way I want, but haven't crossed any boundaries (well, I like to tease him and bump into him sometimes...but I do that with everyone)....and HE is the t and is subject to rules and ethics, etc.
Surely this is a huge burden on you, given the way you feel toward him. At the same time, perhaps the excitement of this married man clearly being turned on/aroused by you is hard to bring to a close - perhaps in a way there is some masochism at play - self-punishment on your part??
I don't think so; if I were not in love with him, I would just blow off his behavior.
>
> I certainly feel an ambiguity regarding my T and what I rationally know is for my own good and what emotionally I sometimes wish for. It shouldn't be for the patient to decipher between these two things, while the T can do what he whims.Absolutely!
>
> It should be the role of the therapist to practice self-control/self-containment, not that of the patient.
>
> Your T threw you onto the couch 7/8 times??? And the other things you mention are creepy and slimy. Are you at all scared when you are there with him?No, never.
Is there a risk that he would physically hurt you or force himself onto you?
He hasn't in all of the years I've been with him, so I am not concerned about that.
Please don't put yourself at that risk.
>
> I'm so sorry he is doing this to you - this isn't how you should be treated - you know this of course.
>
> I hope you can at least start to talk about this with him and that things remain safe and under control.I will be telling him next week about how what he did made me feel. I still feel angry about it. It was just blatant.
(((Witti))): Thank you for caring.
Sassy
>
> ((((SassyFrancesca)))))
poster:sassyfrancesca
thread:852422
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/852615.html