Posted by Wittgensteinz on August 19, 2008, at 1:20:06
In reply to Re: Therapy tomorrow (**suicide triggers**) » Wittgensteinz, posted by daveuk08 on August 18, 2008, at 17:57:48
I'm very sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. I have experienced the same with a close friend who unexpectedly took his life - he was much loved by many, highly talented and the sense of loss was terrible. I know for those left behind it's deeply painful and traumatic.
At the moment I feel that pain - the pain doing such things puts on others - I do have a social conscience. The thing is, in the moment when one is taking such a decision about their life, they are so alone with their own pain (and I'm speaking from my own experience), that the thought of those left behind pales into insignificance. Taking ones life is not really a rational course of action - for the most part not weighed up in terms of the consequences to those left behind - it is an absurd act. It is a very selfish thing to do, perhaps the most selfish thing one can do - I know this - but in my darkest moments there's something driving me so raw and painful that all of those things are forgotten or irrelevant. The desire to end, escape is the only one that dominates - for the rest one feels numb and alone. Perhaps this has to do with my past - growing up, being abused and being alone with it.
I see my T in a few hours and I will work on a way to prevent me from doing this again.
I doubt Slinky could comprehend the pain he/she brought on others when he/she took his life - if he/she could, then he/she would have been healthy enough to go without doing such a thing (I'm guessing). I'm very sorry for your loss.
Thanks for your post.
Witti
poster:Wittgensteinz
thread:846981
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080810/msgs/847142.html