Posted by Wittgensteinz on August 18, 2008, at 17:47:17
In reply to Re: Therapy tomorrow (**suicide triggers**) » Wittgensteinz, posted by rskontos on August 18, 2008, at 15:14:17
Rskontos,
I'm sorry I didn't keep in touch since before. I still think about you too and hope everything is going well. I've never been that good at keeping up with contacts.
The fact is, in theory I can call whenever I need to - there's never been a time when I haven't been able to get in touch when I've wanted/needed to. But at the same time, I don't want to intrude on him. He works from home and his phone is his home phone. I've phoned on occasion and his wife has picked up. It easily feels like I'm being intrusive because of that set-up. There was one time I phoned and it was clear he had a lot of visitors in the background and I felt I was being bothersome, although he'd never suggest that. When the thing happened last Wednesday, phoning him would have likely meant waking him up - the idea of doing that and disturbing his wife at the same time, doesn't sit easily with me.
But I will talk to him about this and try to get further with this topic. I know it's very important to have some good strategies in place. A promise not to do something isn't enough and in some ways doesn't make that much sense - if I feel like doing something like that, then whether or not I've made a promise to him will have little significance in such a moment. I think he has a responsibility to help me more to deal with my suicidal feelings.
I think it is a scare tactic on his part, as he is continuing to work with me despite my breaking the rule. He needs to know that when I'm in that state of mind, the threat of not being able to continue treatment with him is irrelevant.
I will just have to try and talk this all out tomorrow. It's helped posting here and getting these responses.
Thanks for thinking of me.
Witti
poster:Wittgensteinz
thread:846981
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080810/msgs/847063.html