Posted by lovelorn on December 18, 2007, at 11:25:03
In reply to Bad therapy ending, posted by eltoro on December 18, 2007, at 2:45:18
>.. i dealt with it the wrong way...
It is good you see you dealt with something the wrong way. Which way had you wanted to deal with it?
>she kicked me out of therapy because she was not willing to deal with my negativity, 10 minutes earlier she had threathen me to kick me out according to her, but I read it as a legitimate question as if that was what I was looking for, so I didnt see it coming.
Well, I am surprised to read this. How horrible were you? Doesnt' sound too professional to kick you out just because you were expressing negativity. You two should have talked about why you were being so negative. Read what as a legitimate question? And didn't see what coming?
>to explain my side of things, that I was looking for a symbolic goodbye hug, or a pat in the back, and I got needy, and she refused to divert from structured therapy...
What did she say when you told her you were looking for a symbolic goodbye hug, etc. Why symbolic? Or did you really mean you wanted it for real. Being honest with yourself first is always good. Again though, I see her a bit at fault for not addressing this feeling of yours.
>But painfully for me that session ended with me being a manipulative and insensitive person again, thats the summary of all.
Why do you say this? What did you really do to be manipulative and insensitive. Were you really or is that just your perception?
>A couple days later I start to realize the punishment is wildly uncalled for..
Punishment? Therapy is not about punishment. Interesting you think in terms of her punishing you.
>Why is she making me feel that way?
People do things, how you feel about what they do is your own reaction. Maybe you should ask why are you making yourself feel the way you do about her.
>explain via email to someone that you are not a pervert even if you are not sure thats what she is thinking,...
Good point, you aren't sure that is what she is thinking so don't automatically assume that is what she is thinking. Those are your thoughts, not hers.
>because she is so righteous and i am a piece of scum...
Who says you are a piece of scum?
>well, i need a couple sessions with a different therapist to figure a big chunk of this...
You talk about seeing another therapist to try to figure out why she did what she did or said what she said. Think about that. The only person that knows for certain that knows these things is the therapist. So, it is probably a better idea to see another therapist if you want to sort out your own feelings of what happened, but don't expect you will find out what is in her head unless she tells you.
I am sorry it didn't go well. For whatever reasons, it sounds like you and the therapist were working at cross purposes at the end there. If it were me, I would ask for one more session to ask some specific questions from the therapist and to clear up an misconceptions - that is, if the therapist was also open to doing the same.
poster:lovelorn
thread:801388
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071215/msgs/801414.html