Posted by nellie7 on December 18, 2007, at 10:08:16
In reply to Re: Bad therapy ending, posted by eltoro on December 18, 2007, at 3:04:34
Hi Eltero,
I am sorry about the bad termination and the fact that you were hurt by the way your therapist handled it. That kind of thing really makes one feel bad.
Something similar happened to me once and I can understand why you feel the need to try to clear things up by talking to another T.
While it is difficult to know why your T reacted the way she did, one possibility ( based on an attempt to understand my personal experience) is that some therapists try to change what appears to be self-defeating patterns of behavior by making harsh or even shocking remarks. Perhaps they assume that such statements will jolt the patient into some kind of insight regarding the need to change something. In my opinion, that is never the way to go about it, since the severity of the effect on the patient should not be presumed. Besides, "problematic" traits or behavior are part of the patient's difficulties and are a source of his suffering They are not in his awareness, much less in his control.
Another possible explanation is that your therapist's reaction was due to countertransference and was triggered by her own difficulties or sensitivities.
You asked if it is possible that she was positioning herself to be your "enemy". It seems too risky on her part to attempt something like that without taking into account the possibility (or probability?) that you would interpret her behavior as proof of your being "a monster". So I don't know.
Perhaps it is really a good idea to go to several sessions with another therapist. And don't blame yourself. There is no justification for her to make you feel bad about yourself, as you had no negative intentions and did nothing wrong.
Take care,
Nellie.
poster:nellie7
thread:801388
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071215/msgs/801408.html