Posted by slugdoo on July 29, 2007, at 13:56:02
In reply to Re: My DH called me fat and I couldn't do any better » slugdoo, posted by muffled on July 28, 2007, at 22:05:17
Hi Muffy,
You are so right it is so exhasuting trying to put on a happy face when the world is falling apart at your feet. I tried going to the gym and acting normal, a few people noticed I wasn't smiling. Some nice old guy, said, where is the smile?. He was being nice, I tried to smile the best I could . Others noticed, and they don't wanted the depressed slug, they want the happy slug. I am ususally the one trying to make them feel good. So I guess they miss that from me. Most of those friendships are kinda new, and I can't lay this load of crap on them. You can't say when they ask you , how are you, and say my life is sh*t and I don't know why I am living it.
One of my new friends said I looked tired, and said I would feel better when the cloudy front went away later today. I wish that was all it was. Plus though she is a new friend, she is a prof. who works at the univ. where my husband's ex's husband works. So I feel I can't say really what is going on unitl i know I can trust her with that kind of info.
I am trying to take care of myself so hard, I just didn't need this extra sh*t on top of everything else.
You know my DH can call me a fat worthless sh*t , but it hurts a lot more when you child says "mommy isn't as much fun anymore". They both hurt, but what my son just took the wind out of me. It is getting harder to pretend in front of my kids that their parents marriage is okay. I don't know how much longer I can put up that act.
poster:slugdoo
thread:772624
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070726/msgs/772721.html