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Re: whats worse for a daughter....

Posted by Maria01 on July 10, 2007, at 12:19:00

In reply to whats worse for a daughter...., posted by B2chica on July 9, 2007, at 11:08:09

I don't think constant discord is good for anyone; children or adults in the home. the younger a kid is, the more likely they are to blame themselves for the discord.

I think it's important to let your daughter know that none of what is going on is her fault, and to set some ground rules with your husband regarding when/how discussions are going to take place. Have you thought of having a joint session with your husband and T?

While it's good that you are standing your ground, please keep your daughter in mind, and check in with her to see how she feels about what's going on. Some kids feel like they have to "take sides" when parents are fighting, and that's stressful.

I guess one good way to model "fair fighting" is to tell your husband "If you continue to XYZ, then we will need to pick this up later. I meant it when I laid down the rules, and if you don't respect that, I'm not continuing this discussion, period. " If anything, it will show your daughter that settting boundaries BEFORE disagreements happen. That way, if someone insists on not respecting them, it's time to take a break.


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poster:Maria01 thread:768554
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070628/msgs/768723.html