Posted by wishingstar on February 27, 2007, at 18:17:28
In reply to Re: hard session.. bad news.. (long), posted by Dinah on February 27, 2007, at 18:05:21
I agree dinah... there may be some clients who are there twice a week and not in such a hard place anymore, and maybe can be fine with less, or handle it well anyway. But not me. I've never felt this bad in all my history of depression I dont think and there is just no worse time for this to happen. It's not fair to build trust and then rip half the support away when I finally decide to rely on it.
The last three weeks (I think?) I've only been once a week because of my work schedule. The training at the new job made it difficult. I didnt like it one bit.. and really slid downhill quite a bit. I know it might seem like they were unrelated (not seeing her and feeling worse) but I dont think they were. I SIed more in the last 2 weeks than I have in the last 2 years probably (obviously I dont do it often anymore). Of course that isnt her fault.. I'm the one who had to change the schedule anyway. But it was a response to it, I believe.
I guess when I go back on Tues I'll maybe talk to her about some of the suggestions you gave.. midweek calls, homework, etc. Right now my inclination is to just pull away completely and cut off the entire connection to keep myself safe, but that may change in a few days. I will think about that. Right now I just want her gone so I can forget about this and forget about needing her.
poster:wishingstar
thread:736862
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070215/msgs/736883.html