Posted by Racer on July 16, 2006, at 22:24:48
In reply to Re: hospitalization » TherapyGirl, posted by wishingstar on July 16, 2006, at 20:59:54
>I just need a break. I need to feel safe and "watched" even if it's not in a warm, caring way.
That sounds as though you want to feel loved and nurtured, which is pretty much universal. And it also makes me think maybe your parents aren't providing that? Sometimes, for me, thinking about the loving and nurturing I've gotten from my mother over the years makes me feel pretty much as though a psych hospital -- heck, a velcro wall -- would be a pretty good choice.
So, four more weeks at this job, and then you go home. You can do that -- and I'd say the more you stay out of your parents' house, the better you'll be able to get through. Can you invite another teacher out for coffee? To see a comedy show? A band? Can you go to the library and read up on bonobos or Ann Radcliffe? Can you hang out in your classroom and either tutor students or work on lesson plans? Can you journal? Can you get through by pulling a quilt over your head and turning on the TV?
>But in truth, will I hurt myself seriously if I'm not watched? Likely, no... so it's probably not the best choice.
Yep, I'd say you've hit the nail on the head there. I have been in psych hospitals, both voluntary and involuntary, and it's not a pleasant place to be. What's more, even if you go in voluntarily, they may not allow you to leave quite so easily. You may not have the freedom to say, 'Whoops, this ain't what I signed up for...'
When you get home, can you check with those agencies again? From what you've written here, it doesn't sound as though you're feeling heard by your regular T, so switching to a T at one of those agencies where you could see a pdoc for meds, too? I know you said that your school center turned you down, but could you try again? Say that you need short term counseling for adjustment to this eight week job you just finished and staying with your parents? Or something else?
Again, I've had a very bad experience with a T, and it took much, much longer to get over the damage than it took to cause it. Truly, I'm not over it now, and it's been more than two years. If you're not feeling heard and validated in therapy, something is very, very wrong. It's true that she doesn't have to say that you're right about everything, she is supposed to challenge you to find new and more effective ways to negotiate your way through this world, but it's still important that you feel heard first.
Good luck.
poster:Racer
thread:667573
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060703/msgs/667626.html