Posted by muffled on June 2, 2006, at 15:50:27
In reply to Re: Dear ME trigger, posted by llrrrpp on June 2, 2006, at 14:54:40
> Okay. now I feel realer.
***what does that mean anyways????
>
> I have decided to put the dark voice back in the dark. Make *it* feel unreal.***well THAT sounds good
>
> I am ashamed for my posts***Do not be ashamed, we all got our own sh*t.
>
> I feel sorry and guilty for having a crisis on babble. I shouldn't subject you all to such a thing. You're kind of fragile. yes, you may understand, but it's not your job to try to help me.***No it is not my JOB to help you. I CHOOSE to reach out to you cuz I can relate to your pain. Right now I am fortunate enough to be able to do this. Sometimes I can't.
I've read posts of yours and I like lots of what you have said. You are raw and honest and real bout stuff and I respect that.I feel like I diffused the crisis by spreading my issues to others. rather than hold a pile of stinking turds in my hand, I just diluted them and sprayed them around. Maybe you are grateful to be fertilized, but let's just be honest. I sprayed poo on you.
***Spray away. Wouldn't be this first time someones sprayed poo or that I myself have done the spraying. We are here for each other as best we can do. Poo and all.
>
> And I apologize for my poor judgment and my lack of concern for real people with real problems. people who came to babble to share happiness, and ended up inhaling poo droplets instead.***Ah Llrrrpp. You make me feel better in your posts cuz I don't feel so alone and such a reject. I don not come here to share happiness all the time. I come to share my questions and pain too, and to get confirmation and support from others who don't put me down.
>
> I apologize to people with questions and comments that actually pertain to something mutable, something that can be positively affected by the babble community.***I'm not that smart! What does mutable mean?!
>
> And I apologize to people who got worried on my behalf.
You have wasted your empathy.*** I have not worried so much as I've wished to try to come alongside you in your struggles, thats all.
Any second you spent reading my posts from yesterday, or thinking about the hurtful things I do to myself is a second that you lost when you could have been playing with your puppy or your diggerydoo, or picking flowers from your garden, or eating vanilla ice cream with hot fudge and a shot of chocolate sauce. You could have been watching a mind-numbing commercial on the telly and it still would have been a better use of your time.
***Well, sorry, but I gotta beg to disagree. I am learning much about myself in my interactions with you. Better than the stupid TV.
>
> I'll be quieter next time I have crises***Well I don't want you to have crisises, but I personally don't mind you having them on babble cuz as I have said it helps me too.
The only thing I have found is that sometimes I DO have to walk away from babble cuz it sometimes sort of intensifies things in a worse way when I start writing and dwelling on my crisis of the week too much.
>
> yours truly
> llrrrpp***Thanks Llrrrp.
You take care.
Really, you ok in my book if thats of any consequence to you.
Muffy
poster:muffled
thread:650669
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060526/msgs/652010.html