Posted by fallsfall on April 2, 2006, at 12:10:24
In reply to Re: Of course (possible trigger), posted by Dinah on April 2, 2006, at 11:35:50
Just because he wants to blame you for anything that goes wrong doesn't make it reasonable for him do so. Don't give this one up without a fight. You've done well to remind him of the promise that he made that he would look for other work locally. He obviously has some fear of staying where the hurricanes cause such havoc. That is a reasonable fear. But that doesn't translate into "It's all Dinah's fault".
I get the feeling that he says "I want to do X" and you say "I want to do Y". And the two of you say "See, one of us is going to lose because we don't want the same thing". Can you talk about WHY you want Y and he wants X? These aren't black and white decisions. You have reasons, and perhaps by discussing your reasons together you can find some common ground so it isn't Dinah vs. Hubby, it becomes Dinah's family vs. the world. I think you both have valid arguments. Your son's school is important. Being able to see your therapist is important (well... you know my feelings on this). His ability to earn enough money to support the family is important. All of your happiness with the arrangements are important.
By discussing things you have made him aware of something he didn't know (that there are job opportunities close by). Maybe by discussing things he will make you aware of something you don't know??
This is such a strange post for me. I am recommending flexibility. I'm terrible at being flexible.
poster:fallsfall
thread:626821
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060325/msgs/627818.html