Posted by annierose on November 26, 2005, at 15:08:14
In reply to Re: family and the holidays and therapists » daisym, posted by rainbowbrite on November 25, 2005, at 19:03:10
I just read this tread and it's got me thinking. I do think T's forget to hear things somethings in the proper context. Yes, my parents did such and such and were not there for such and such. But ... should I not visit them on holidays because they didn't know any better?
I always tell my daughter, when you know better you do better. I just don't think my parents knew how to parent.
I understand what Daisy wrote when she said about disappointing our T's. My T sounded surprised when I told her my Thanksgiving plans, "but you'll have no allies there." Of course I did. I went with my husband, two children and my nieces and nephews do think I'm a cool aunt! So what if I hang out at the kid table.
And in therapy, we tend to talk about the hard stuff. The painful experiences, the bad memories. So their frame of reference of our childhood is slanted way towards dysfunctional. Of course my T (if she were to read this) would say, "There you go dimishing your childhood experiences."
I guess, in the end, we get to make these decisions all by ourselves. My T has been on vacation all week and I got to say, I miss her. My parents live out of state 1/2 the year, and I never ever miss them. What does that say?
poster:annierose
thread:581908
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051118/msgs/582409.html