Posted by rainbowbrite on November 25, 2005, at 16:29:33
In reply to Re: family and the holidays and therapists » rainbowbrite, posted by daisym on November 25, 2005, at 12:09:23
> I'm not sure what you mean by "stupid teen stuff" -- can you use an example?
>I guess I mean things like not wanting to go to certain events because I wanted to be with friends or not wanting to go to church christmas eve, just becuase. The t I was seeing really pushed and encouraged that I argue for my side and not do those family things if I didnt feel I wanted to. the attitude was "who cares", i know its over and done with now, But at the time it was upsetting for my parents and me to have these battles.
Recently the t im seeing said something with this same attitude (when I was throwing out a senario trying to figure out what the best thing to do was), like..."who cares if its a family thing, do what YOU want". There are a few examples Id like to use but they are too personal. Its just that t's have a lot of "power" at times and I find it interesting how they encourage this individualism, but Im sure if their kid was being given this advice they would be pi**ed!
when it happened again with this t it triggered my memory of the past and I was curious if this was common for therapists. This attitude of who cares about your family, its all about YOU.> We all outgrow certain behaviors but on the other hand, sometimes our families refuse to let us outgrow them. When I was 5, I fell asleep in the mashed potato pile on my plate at Easter. I don't really like them, so I don't eat them now. But my family brings it up everytime insisting that I shouldn't be embarrassed or worried that I'll do it again. They are teasing me, of course. But geez, I'm 43 -- I can CHOOSE what I'll eat now or not! :) It is amazing how change is encouraged but not really allowed.
That cute, you know, Daisy, its ok to fall asleep in your potatoes ;-)
poster:rainbowbrite
thread:581908
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051118/msgs/582146.html