Posted by daisym on July 11, 2005, at 23:47:38
In reply to Worst I’ve felt in months, posted by Tamar on July 11, 2005, at 18:39:19
I want to do both for you: offer comfort and make it all go away. I was driving up the freeway this morning, the sky was blue and there was this big hot air balloon sailing away over the hills. I opened the top to my car, pushed in a tape of Martina (Independence Day) and chased that balloon for 20 minutes. I was sad when I came to my turn off, because for those 20 minutes, I felt 22 again, with no cares, no responsibilities and the fearless freedom of driving fast and singing loud. I highly recommend it.
I define myself by my work. Who I am, who I am supposed to be and the expectations I have to live up to are all about work. My mother was incredibly successful, one of those glass ceiling breaker gals...so I totally empathize with your worry about humiliation and everyone thinking you are worthless. I've seen those looks before and it cuts right to your soul. Just take one thing at a time and try to minimize the damage.
I hope the fact that you know you are cared for and appreciated here makes some difference. And your family will forgive you for some bad mood angst. Maybe your husband is giving you some space instead of avoiding sex? It has always sounded like you guys were close enough to talk about this stuff, can you ask him?
And missing your therapist is totally understandable with all this going on. I wish you had a picture too. But if you close your eyes, I bet you can hear him, reminding you that you can make it through this.
Remember to breathe,
Daisy
poster:daisym
thread:526327
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050706/msgs/526531.html