Posted by pinkeye on June 30, 2005, at 16:14:23
There is something interesting that came up in my discussion with my current T today. I kept telling her that my father and my ex T are my point of strength. That they give me the necessary emotional strength and support to go on and even give me the energy and reason to live.
She disagrees. She says I am much stronger than my father. (she doesn't comment about my ex T much becuase of her professionalism I think - she just says I project everything on to my ex T from my dad and so she would treat it the same because they mean the same to me).
She says my father does nothing but harm me more.. That he infact takes away my strength - that he causes me extreme pessimism, confusion, anxiety, and intrudes into my family life with my husband. She says that I am stronger than my dad - that I need to really make a very firm boundary with him to be able to live well. She says all these years, he has only been adding more problems to me and that he didn't really do me any good or give me any strength. If anything, he took away my strength and optimism and innocence about life.
She says I really need to understand that depending on my father is not the right thing for me.. that I am much better than him, and until I understand that, I am going to artifically look for people who display those characteristics. And she thinks it is the same confusion with my ex T also. She keeps saying I am giving him so much of importance, and role in my life, and he doesn't want it, but that I am refusing to see it, and I am obsessing about it. She says, I am tring to relive what happens with my dad through my ex T. She says it is not worth it.. spending so much time agonizing over my father or my ex T. That I am just as equal a person as they are. And that I am much better off on my own.
poster:pinkeye
thread:521616
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050628/msgs/521616.html