Posted by pinkeye on May 15, 2005, at 18:53:35
In reply to Re: Do any of you block your T or ex T out? » pinkeye, posted by Tamar on May 15, 2005, at 18:33:06
> Well, maybe it's something you can talk about with your T, as she's trying to encourage you to feel angry.
Yeah.. that is what has been the main focus of therapy so long. To feel angry at my dad.
> > It might be something like projection, since you say you don't want him to end up like your father. But I think he is probably different from your father in some important ways. And maybe that will keep him from becoming like your father. What do you think?
>
It is actually pretty funny how much I projected on to him.Many times, I used to think he would be angry at me for my arthritis pain.. just like my dad was angry at my mom for her pain. I kept feeling that he would tell me it is all my fault - that I had arthritis.
I used to be also very scared of him.. Somehow kept thinking that he will scold me a lot - even when he didn't show any intention of it.
And I used to think he will tell me to cut the crap - don't talk about emotions, just do things.
And I actually used to feel sorry for his wife sometime.. I used to wonder how he would treat his wife.. if he would be scolding her, not understanding her, he would make her do stuff she didn't want to.
I even used to feel scared for him - that he would end up becoming poor.
I think pretty much recreated everything about my father.
But in my rational mind, I know it is not like that.. But sometimes, especially before termination and before I understood my projection, I used to feel he is exactly like my father many times.
Now I understand more.
poster:pinkeye
thread:498065
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050513/msgs/498195.html