Posted by daisym on May 13, 2005, at 10:35:41
In reply to Re: another cycle » Shortelise, posted by Dinah on May 13, 2005, at 7:59:33
I think we all have different pieces of ourselves, some larger and some smaller, that cope differently with situations. And I think we work hard to keep our strongest pieces up front, to cope with the hard stuff. But when something triggers the old stuff, the more fragile piece, that comes to the forefront, and down we go.
I think those competent parts are just dismayed that "we" can "still" feel hurt, confused, sad, anxious, or any of the above about what seems to not be an overwhelming situation. So we put pressure on ourselves to handle it, to do better, to not cry over spilled milk. And we insist we can hold it, deal with it ourselves...because after all, haven't we spent years in therapy learning to recognize these distorted responses and know where they are coming from?
I think every time these sad parts get triggered, we mourn all over again. Some of us mourn the fact that we have these parts at all!
I think it is interesting that when we have periods where we feel silly, or naughty, or irresponsibly childish, we don't beat ourselves up over these. We kind of like the break from the upfront grown up.
I don't really have an answer for you. My therapist would say don't stuff these feelings away, let yourself feel it fully. I hate that! He would also encourage me to try to tackle some of the disorganization -- make a list, clean one room, make the bed -- whatever you can do to create a carved out peaceful spot for yourself right now. He would also say eat right, rest but not too much and try to take a walk and call him if I needed to just touch base.
I hope you find a way to have a peaceful weekend.
poster:daisym
thread:497182
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050513/msgs/497287.html