Posted by pinkeye on May 12, 2005, at 14:33:58
In reply to Re: I think I have some serious issues **trigger**, posted by sunny10 on May 12, 2005, at 14:15:40
Thanks Sunny
But he gets very angry, and I make him angry.
But today I asked him - if your mother made you angry, would you pull her hair and shake her head like this? And he said he would'nt. And apologized.
And he is a very good guy basically. I feel like I am the one doing all the bad things. And I am the one not able to live up to my promise of going back to India. And his father is really getting sick, and I feel it is my responsibility to let my husband take care of his father. I don't want to be a jerk and not let him do that. But I am finding it so very hard.
I somehow try to compromise - ask my husband to go first and I will stay here or 6 months there, 6 months here kind of arrangement.. but my hsuband isn't interested in any of it.
And I agreed to him before my marriage to go back.. that is what makes it bad for me.
But I agree about the physical violence. He gets upset about everything, and he gets really reall mad.. Once I said it is ok to have an affair (we were talking about someone else, not me), and he beat me. And then once I said something about his religious guru, he beat me, and once I said I wanted to go and meet some spriitual person who he didn't approve of, and he beat me for that, and tore my dress. And if I talk of getting a divorce he used to beat me. It has happened 10 - 15 times in the past 2 years.
And everytime I think it will stop, but it stops for a few months and he resorts to it again. I don't know really if I am making him like this..
poster:pinkeye
thread:496916
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050504/msgs/496930.html