Posted by Shortelise on January 25, 2005, at 0:34:36
In reply to Whose responsibility is it?, posted by Daisym on January 24, 2005, at 22:59:59
May I approach this from another angle?
Can it be sooner a response than a responsibility?
If you feel you need to call him, then you call him. If he feels you need him, then he calls you. The response to the feeling is the call.
Does that make sense?
Talking of responsibility in these circumstances seems unnecessary. Your feelings are so strong, so important, and the work you are doing in therapy is so important -- to inquire as to who is responsible for what at this juncture is like trying to tell a baby to make sure it cries when it's hungry, or when it needs to go to sleep.
However you can express it , however you can get through this with as little harm to yourself, that's how to do it. Chart new territory.
Write whatever rules you want. Write them and then tear them up and writethem again if you like. Do this however you have to do it. Your T is there to help you and it sounds like you have a wonderful T.
The one thing I would like to point out - or have I already pointed out too much? Probably, and you can stop reading anytime:-) - but nowis a time when you ought to have what you need, calls from your T, love and support from as many as there are to give it to you. You are doing something incredibly brave - you are looking into the depths of ugliness. You should have what you need to help you do it with the least pain possible.
Forgive my vehemence. I just feel so strongly about this.
Hugs,
ShortE
poster:Shortelise
thread:447134
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050122/msgs/447197.html