Posted by shrinking violet on November 5, 2004, at 11:34:59
In reply to Re: Meaningless Musing on my Therapist » Miss Honeychurch, posted by mandinka on November 5, 2004, at 11:20:37
I'm sorry this is so painful for you.
I've been considering telling my T (currently ex-T, but I'm thinking of going back if she'll accept me again) that I love her during our last session (not sexual love at all, just grateful- respectful-type love for her as a person and for working so hard as my T, and for the caring she gives, etc). I want to wait until then to tell her mostly out of fear of her response and don't want to chance that it would taint her feeling toward me or the therapy in any way if I told her while treatment was ongoing. Part of me thinks she'll be very accepting and touched by it, given her personality and the way she is with me. The other part is afraid it'll be awkward or weird. And I'd hate to do anything during our last session that I might regret or have fall flat and then have to live with that forever. But I know that if I didn't tell her, it would bother me just as much.
If you feel like you *have* to tell your T this, then try to find a way to do it. Would telling yourself that you will definitely do it at some point before you end with him help? That way the need might not feel so urgent and you could then think about it a bit more objectively. In the meantime, perhaps broach the subject of terminations in general, how he handles them, how clients react, how he feels, etc. Maybe you'll get a better "read" from him that way before you talk about your situation specifically.
Take care and good luck.
SV
poster:shrinking violet
thread:411786
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041104/msgs/412122.html