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I wonder if she made it worse

Posted by mair on September 21, 2004, at 17:45:27

I have a pretty awful situation where I work - something my therapist and I have been speaking about for awhile. It got worse and in my mind more complicated over the weekend and I've been really depressed since then. No one else would probably appreciate the effect this problem has on my mental health, other than my therapist, and only her because it's been such a focus of our sessions lately. But she's suddenly become very proactive, insisting to me that this has to be addressed quickly and trying to get me to bring my husband in to the next session so he can help fashion an approach to dealing with this (he's not the problem, but he does work in the same place), and she made a big deal about encouraging me to call her at any time between now and the next session - she's pretty much never done that.

I know she's trying to help but I get panicked when I think about drawing my husband into this - he's under too much stress as it is that the thought of involving him makes me feel like I'm pulling him down. It's very hard for me to see past the logic that my death and the pretty sizeable death benefits on my life insurance policy would go a huge distance in simplifying his life. So I think about that and it seems to make so much sense but I get choked up thinking about missing my children.

And believe me - no one else would understand why I can't deal with all this so much better. My T obviously takes this very seriously and it's mortifying to me that I'm not more resilient or more capable of advocating for myself. How could I be such a basket case?

I really don't know what to do.


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poster:mair thread:393431
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040918/msgs/393431.html