Posted by partlycloudy on June 10, 2004, at 9:59:32
In reply to Core belief about being wanted, posted by tabitha on June 10, 2004, at 1:54:19
I believe that this core issue about being wanted is very common with people in therapy. When my T asked me what my core beliefs consisted of, I replied that I am not worthy (also that I'm a loser, I don't deserve the good things I have). When my depression has receded, those beliefs persist.
And, like you, it doesn't matter how much people like me it's not so, or how often my husband tells me I'm beautiful and the "best woman in the whole wide world" (he says it all in one go like a mantra); at my core I don't believe it's true. It is ingrained in us - and how do you undo a lifetime's worth of beliefs?
After my last bout with my evaporated self esteem, my T reccommended I try EMDR therapy. I've been evaluated and am starting next week - trembling in my boots - but I want so much to be better than I am now that I'm willing to try ANYTHING. There has to be a way to get past the losses in our lives to help us grow. The EMDR T has asked me to address some holistic issues in preparation for the therapy: becoming aware of energy levels around me and what I can do to operate at a higher energy level. There's a part of me that says it's a load of hooey, but I have to acknowledge that the mind-body connection is undeniable. So I'm looking at things like music, food, colours, and furniture arrangement. I kid you not.
I hope I didn't get too off topic here (I always feel well out of my depth on this board!). My intention is to say that I think we CAN change our core beliefs and that there are many different approaches to do it.
poster:partlycloudy
thread:355290
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040603/msgs/355375.html