Posted by Karen_kay on January 30, 2004, at 21:35:09
In reply to Re: New thoughts on T disclosures re: countertransfer. » Karen_kay, posted by crushedout on January 30, 2004, at 19:33:22
I realize that it may make the client feel good, but wouldn't it make the client feel awkward? I mean honestly if your therapist were to tell you that she (that's right isn't it?) had sexual feelings about you (are we just talking about sexual or otherwise) how would that honestly make you feel? I have to say, as much as I would LOVE to hear it, it would make me a bit uncomfortable. I mean, it would question the motive behind every piece of advice he gave me. It would make me question every thing he said. It would honestly just play games with my head. I think the fantasy of thinking that he possibly thinks those things would be so much better than the reality.
I'm not trying to be argumentative, please don't get me wrong. And I do think that the relationship should be authentic indeed. But, there is a certain point of honesty that I think is acceptable and in the interest of the client. Then, past that point, I think personally it would only be serving the personal interest of the therapist.
Like, with my therapist for example, saying what he did about having fantasies about clients....Again, since it wasn't about me, I'd say that was acceptable. However, if he had said it was me, that would not be acceptable because that would be fulfilling only his agenda.
I just think that clients go to therapy with enough issues, why try to add to them with the burden of therapist's own, you know? I mean I worry constantly about my therapist now and I didn't worry about him before I knew him. If he were to fire me as a client, that would only add to my plate. And I wouldn't want to think about the added burden of him saying something like, "I can't see you anymore because I'm sexually attracted to you." Oh, bother! I'd just say, "Look, I'll ugly myself up, just for you!"
poster:Karen_kay
thread:307129
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040123/msgs/307536.html