Posted by Karen_kay on December 2, 2003, at 14:31:38
So, I went to see my therapist today. And he didn't say I looked beautiful again. At the end of the session I finally asked why he hadn't told me I looked beautiful for 2 weeks in a row. He said, "Well, if I keep telling you that you look beautiful it could open the door to boundary crossing. It starts as "You look beautiful today" then moves to "You look sexy today" then could lead to "Let's have sex." Hmmmm... Well, I argued that would never happen, as I always run anyway and he said that I don't know the state of his marriage. He doesn't do it to boost my self esteem, he does it to show me that men can make comments like that without seeing me as a lustfull object. I did get him to call me beautiful again today. And he admitted that he called me beautiful again today. He also asked why it was important that he call me beautiful, shouldn't my boyfriend do it, or myself. I told him that I have almost come to rely upon him to do it. He then said that he will continue to do it in the future, but it will not be every week. My question, if he knows that I manipulate people why does he allow me to manipulate him? If this is a serious concern for him, then why does he give in? He does it all the time, like me calling him daddy, which he said I couldn't do, but gave in once I persuaded him. I tell him all the time that he needs to stand his ground but he lets me persuade him. If I have a problem manipulating people why does he allow me to manipulate him, of all people? I just don't get it.....
poster:Karen_kay
thread:285945
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031202/msgs/285945.html