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Re: feeling powerless

Posted by Dr. Bob on May 3, 2013, at 23:45:03

In reply to Scott's response - justdoit » Dr. Bob, posted by SLS on May 3, 2013, at 16:02:48

> Unfortunately, this suggestion does not address the problem which is concerning many of us: the inequitable application of "please be civil" warnings. Burying all complaints in private administrative messages allows even freer rein to the uncivil behavior which is disturbing so many people here in the first place.
>
> Twinleaf

The guidelines here apply even to those who have difficulty understanding how, or why, they apply to them. Some posters may obsess and perseverate about their agendas and perceived harms.

--

> When you list my posts like this it makes me feel a little like a bully. Then I think of the posters who this individual has upset over the years and I fell less so.
>
> Toph

Thank you for sharing that. You felt less like a bully, or more justified in bullying?

Those who see others being bullied, or are bullied themselves, can start to feel justified in bullying others. If you felt more justified in bullying, you may have experienced firsthand how that can happen. And you may now be able to feel more empathy for bullies.

Not that empathy is the answer to everything.

--

> > Lou may express what they think and fear. What would reassure posters who feel frightened? Blocking Lou?
>
> Yes, of course.

Maybe. But if I were frightened of medication, I don't think blocking someone who expressed fear of medication would reassure me.

> Whether or not Lou scares people is not a criterion for his being blocked. However, he could be blocked for overtly and repeatedly violating your FAQ rules of civility.

You can help this site run smoothly by notifying me of issues you see on the boards. Use the "notify administrators" buttons below the posts:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#help

> Change? It may be that Lou would change his uncivil posting behaviors rather than be blocked interminably ... As always, you can begin this process of change by first issuing PBCs.
>
> - Scott

In fact, I've issued more than one PBC to Lou, and IMO his posting behavior has changed. Which side is more capable of changing?

--

I sense a theme of powerlessness. Some posters may feel powerless to change how Lou behaves. Some posters may feel powerless to change how I behave. I may feel powerless to change how some posters behave. All of us may feel powerless against mental illness.

Bob


a brilliant and reticent Web mastermind -- The New York Times
backpedals well -- PartlyCloudy


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poster:Dr. Bob thread:1042981
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20130109/msgs/1043161.html