Posted by krazy kat on June 26, 2002, at 11:15:46
In reply to Re: As someone who once lurked, suicidal. . . » Zo, posted by wendy b. on June 26, 2002, at 10:19:34
> Zo, I'm so glad you're writing on the Boards again,
Me too.
> I think, had I been hit in the face with a page, with a mention, with *any* evidence of a real suicide.
It's a valid point. So, we should be able to do a memorial not mentioning the suicide without a problem? This provides old-timers who knew Sar a sort-of "heads up" what's happened here, and they can ask for details.
> > But as a once enormously vulnerable reader of PB. .. In that stripped down state of mind, everything's a scorecard, you're looking for signs--okay, she is making it, and here's someone else who sounds bad off, but they're making it. . .
This is interesting, because numbers make (made?) no difference to me. Only people I go to know on the site could have helped me like they have at times.
All of Wendy's questions are good, I won't repeat them...
> > Maybe we need to separate our personal feelings about Sar.. . from the implicit obligation that a public message board has.
I like Wendy's response: 'But personal feelings are all over this board.'
That's obvious and true but was not my first reaction. My first reaction was to take your comment personally. :)
So, if it were someone I hadn't known or cared about? I don't know. I could certainly see why it would be important to others who had known that person. There are two issues fulfilled by a memorial here:
1. Some contributors want a memorial - that's reason enough. Does a vote need to be taken? (seriously).
2. A month after a death, that person still seems close. Two months? Then three? Then...?? it literally "memorializes" her on a site that she found to be an important part of the latter days of her life. If one searches for Sar now, there's only a tiny wisp of thread that holds her here yet. We are in the awkward position of not knowing her family and friends, though we were family and friends.I think when we get into the concept of "our responsibility" it can be touchy -- as in, "it's our responsibility to convert all Natives to Christians", i.e. the Inquisition. One can really believe that one is doing the "right" thing, even though it's really an attempt to accomplish other goals. (Not saying this about you, Zo, just in general).
I'm exhausted now.
- kk
poster:krazy kat
thread:5764
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020510/msgs/5815.html