Posted by linkadge on November 17, 2019, at 18:14:15
I've just had one of the worse relapses in my life. I am still trying to process exactly what has happened.
I had been sleeping relatively well for the past few months. Within a matter of days, I started waking up within a few hours of falling a sleep with a feeling of horrible dread / panic. I took some old clonazepam which barely touched it. After more clonazepam I was able to fall asleep for perhaps 4 hours. I woke up at 4-5 in the morning with insane physical anxiety (feeling it in the back of my kidneys - adrenaline, cortisol release, who knows).
The next day I experienced intense anxiety throughout the day, mostly physical. Almost like serotonin syndrome or something (but with no change in meds).
This pattern has continued for a few days. I has subsided a bit, but I am left completely shattered. I don't know what brought this on, and why it has been so difficult to treat.
Early morning wakenings are my #1 fear as there seems to be little way to treat it.
I had been feeling some depression / apathy leading up to this event. I'm not sure (if I am bipolar) if this was a switch into mania (or a mixed state).
I have had this pattern in the past (far beyond regular run of the mill anxiety / insomnia). When it happens, the force is so strong, it seems to override heavy medications.
Meds that would normally knock me out barely touch it.
Linkadge
poster:linkadge
thread:1106819
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20191019/msgs/1106819.html