Posted by bulldog2 on November 2, 2009, at 12:57:40
In reply to Re: Parnate losing effectiveness. Why?? Help pleas » metafunj, posted by Girlnterrupted78 on November 2, 2009, at 12:36:49
> Well, he's always asking me about that. He asks me whether I'm overspending, engaging in any risky behavior, talking excessively to people, etc, and my answer is always no. So I'd say I was never manic while it was working better (better than now.. it's still working, but at a much lower level.)
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> One of the features of my depression is that I feel a gut-wrenching feeling whenever I engage in social interactions. It's an unexplainable emotional distress that makes absolutely no sense at all and makes me subdued, uncomfortable, awkward and upset. It was so distressing that I avoided most social interactions and the ones that were inevitable (work for the most part) caused me horrible grief, ruminations, and loss of confidence and self-esteem, which in turn, worsened my depression. I avoided things because I knew they'd have the effect of slowly depressing me more and more, and I was afraid of falling too low.
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> As Parnate began working, that feeling disappeared completely and was replaced with happiness and social excitement coming from within. I noticed I was able to change people's moods, smile and just do the same thing I had done before (made people uncomfortable) but in the opposite way--I made people at ease and happy. They say that energy doesn't disappear, it just changes, so I guess that negative energy I had before turned into positive somehow. I remember it was the same thing when Celexa was working, but even better.
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> So according to my doctor, that was "too good". I don't know how does he want me to feel. Maybe he wants me to be less happy and smile less? Or not be as friendly and outgoing? He especially mentioned the 'talking to strangers' part, as being too much. Like if talking to strangers was a sign of mania or a negative thing.
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> There is one thing, though, unrelated to this, that I was feeling while Parnate was working, and that I don't remember telling my doctor about. When I came home at night, I began talking to myself nonstop. I couldn't stop it. I tried to say "ok, now you're going to shut up" but I kept saying the things i was thinking, nothing crazy, just like those people who are constantly talking to themselves about things they have to do, things they have to finish, things they are going to tell other people, etc. And I was extremely hyper during the nighttime. I don't think this happened during the day... but at night it was really bad.
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> When Parnate began losing it's potency, that effect stopped completely and was replaced with total exhaustion at night, to the point I almost can't do anything and a lot of times I'm too exhausted to even cook myself dinner.
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> I always wondered what was all that talking out loud all about. I really liked the energy, though, it was a nice feeling, but I don't know why even if I tried to shut up, I just couldn't do it. One day I told myself "Ok, that's it. You're shutting up right now." And I really just couldn't. Again, this was only at night, and it was a lot of energy that I wish I'd had during the day instead.
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> Now I barely open my mouth, lol, and I'm too tired to do anything, even more tired than before I started Parnate. I have no idea what could have happened to cause this change.
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> Thanks for your response and the info regarding mania. I haven't engaged in any risky behavior, or spent all my money, or anything that characterizes mania. The only effect Parnate had on me was that it turned my distress into happiness. Not into flatness, but into actual happiness. Is that a sign of mania? I really hope not..
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> > I know someone who felt so good on nardil that they became manic and this person reported that it was so abnormal they started to become psychotic. Maybe your doctor is worried about this. Even when I took prozac the first time nothing bothred me. It was unnatural because I couldn't relate to anyone feeling bad after awhile, since things couldn't bother me for a long time.
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>1. There seems to be a cultural bias against happiness in our culture. Perhaps your happiness offends your doctor. We are hear to work, have kids go to church, work and more work. The old puritan ethic.
2. Perhaps he thought you were going into mania which can result in dangerous conditions or actions.
3. From my point of view one can never be to happy. I even enjoy a bit of mania if my behavior is under control. I don't believe in point one and point two would be the only valid consideration.
4. Maybe he wants you to learn to settle for less. That makes his job easier. Anyhow unless you have become dangerously manic in the past I would ditch him for a doc who believes in happiness!
poster:bulldog2
thread:923267
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20091029/msgs/924095.html