Posted by 4WD on October 1, 2006, at 12:47:04
In reply to For 4WD, posted by MCush on October 1, 2006, at 8:40:40
I know. I worry too about the day or night when the rational part of me is completely lost and I can't see any light at all and give up. That scares me too.
It sounds as if on some level you enjoy the heightened energy level. (I guess I'd have to call that state mania or at least hypomania.). do you ever do things while in that state that you later regretted or saw were foolish? My niece is bipolar and while on an "up" cycle whent out and bought seven pairs of Chanel sunglasses. Ever do anything like that? maybe your obsessive studying is similar.
I wish my energy level was high without the accompanying sick scared feeling in the pit of my stomach. But I don't have the collapses that you do either. When my fear goes away, I feel normal, okay.
I definitely think you doctor needs to know what's going on. maybe you could print out some of the posts you've entered here and take them with you to your appointment. You've described here pretty eloquently what your emotional state feels like. It's hard sometimes to get them to understand when you have a time limited appt.
Marsha
poster:4WD
thread:690211
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060927/msgs/690830.html