Posted by jerrympls on September 4, 2004, at 21:04:14
In reply to Re: Thanks all - I'm done. » jerrympls, posted by SLS on September 3, 2004, at 7:31:51
I've been on everything....so many combinations...so many meds...ECT, Vegal Nerve implant, MAOIs, SSRIs, SNRIs, trycyclics, heterocyclics, sims, benzos, anti-psychotics, anti-eplieptics, mood stabilizers, herbals, talk therapy, CBtherapy, opiate therapy (which works but my doctors pulled out of).
I don't drink, smoke or use illegal dugs.
I'm angry...and frustrated...and numb seeing life go by.
For what it's worth - here's what I am on now
375mg Effexor XR
56mg Concerta
40mg Valium (in 4 divided doses)
.25mg Halcion
3mg Melatonin
SynthriodI have no sex drive, no music flowing through me (I'm a musician), no creativity, no motivation, low self-esteem, poor body image because of med induced weight gain, anger, restlessness, insomnia..the list goes on.
My apt. is a disaster - unopened mail in piles and piles...pizza boxes, dishes in the sink, laundry all over....dusty cds....only a path to my couch.
I hate summer...it's so hot. I spend my weekends inside sitting or sleeping on my couch in front of my air conditioner. I've always liked Fall most of all.
It's been like this for 13 years now. Started when I was about 19-20. I'm 32 now. Male...single...and gay (not that that matters).
I've always longed for validation...for someone to stand up for me...and at work I only receive what I call anti-validation. I'm never given credit for my work....nor do I say anything...I just keep it inside fueling my anger. I know that's not healthy....but how not to?
Thanks again to all for your support...you're all I have right now.
Jerry
poster:jerrympls
thread:385815
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040904/msgs/386491.html