Posted by Waterlily on November 30, 2003, at 15:08:36
In reply to Someone please help....last ditch effort!, posted by RWF on November 29, 2003, at 11:18:17
Depression will numb any and all positive emotions. I'm sorry you've not had good experiences with Effexor or Luvox, but I think you should keep searching. I have reacted differently to each an every antidepressant I've tried. Also, please talk to your therapist about your feelings. This is a big issue for you and is obviously eating you up. It's hard for your therapist to get to the meat of your problems if you are not forthcoming with what's going on. It will help just to get it out on the table for discussion and your therapist should be able to give you some ideas for dealing with it.
Another thing to keep in mind is that in addition to your depression numbing your feelings of love, familiarity and time has a tendency to reduce the fire that you may have had in the past. It's great to have a marriage that is passionate...certainly something to aim for, but don't feel bad if it's not that way for you. People sometimes expect too much from marriage. I've been married for nearly 15 years. I love my husband but don't always feel the fire.
You needn't worry about loving your second child. You will. My second daughter, now 9, is a joy and is oftentimes easier to deal with than my 11 year old. My older daughter has dealt with depression, OCD, and ADD and has been a challenge since she was born. My youngest has been a perpetually happy child, with none of the emotional problems that the oldest has.
Regarding feeling like you're going to lose control of yourself, I've had those feelings as well especially as they regard to . It is terrible worrying that you'll do it against your better judgement. It took every ounce of mental power I had to fend off those thoughts and was terribly emotionally exhausting.
I wish I had something to say that would make all your problems go away, but I don't. I just hope that you are able to get help and get over these feelings you have.
poster:Waterlily
thread:284960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20031126/msgs/285278.html