Posted by Barbara Cat on July 31, 2003, at 16:15:41
In reply to Re: Feeling pretty bad » Barbara Cat, posted by nmk on July 31, 2003, at 13:35:30
Dear Nicole,
Thank you so much, sweetie. You've made a big difference to me today. I feel your care so much. Thank you. Today is up and down, well not really much up. The real hard stuff is the panic attacks, which I haven't had for a few years. I'll wake up out of sleep and be in the middle of one. I can stand anything, but not them. I stopped taking nortriptyline not too long ago and I think this may be a fallout from that, at least in part. The other part is that there's some PTSD flashbacks coming very strong from my, uh, challenging childhood. I never know what I'm supposed to do with this stuff - is it my extra sensitive nervous system due to med withdrawal? Is it something I should be processing?I've grown weary and suspicious of the whole psychotherapist thing, especially with the in-and-out managed care travesty and health records open to far too many people. Here I am with the only place left to go, and that is Spirit, my inner knowing, and maybe that's what I need to learn. It's as good enough reason as any, I guess. So, luckily, I'm in a position where I'm not working, can swing on my hammock on the porch, pet my cats, ocassionally talk to the hubby, keep taking lithium and lamictal, but by God, I will not go back to an antidepressant again. There's got to be another way. Like you wisely said, we will beat this thing. Maybe not 100% but I'll take what I can get. Love and thanks to you. - Barbara
poster:Barbara Cat
thread:9730
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030728/msgs/247118.html