Posted by katia on June 2, 2003, at 12:44:11
In reply to Re: Would this be considered hypomania? » katia, posted by Ron Hill on June 2, 2003, at 9:57:04
> Hi Katia,
>
> > when you say bipolar cycling, do you mean basically "moodiness"? I feel hypomanic, but have never been given the dx. I am alternating b/t feeling inspired and wanting to write a book to feeling so agitated that I want to crawl out of my skin; especially if triggered like at a bright supermarket or stores/banks, where I have to wait in line; and then finally to feeling depressed and have crying bouts. It's been going on for the past month since starting on Serzone.
>
> It sounds like you might be cycling between a slightly euphoric hypomanic, a dysphoric hypomanic, and a depressive mood state. But I’m NOT a pdoc. Is it possible that the Serzone is causing (or contributing to) your mood instability? This condition (AD induced hypomania and/or cycling) is often referred to as bipolar III (provided no symptoms are present without the AD).
>
> Please read the following information. It is on Dr. Phelps' web site and it discusses the controversy surrounding BP patients taking antidepressants:
>
> http://www.psycheducation.org/bipolar/controversy.htm
>
> It seems to me that job-one should be to get your dx nailed down. Then invest the time required on the net to research treatment options for your particular disorder. Start this process by spending the ten bucks required to take this on-line diagnosis screening test. The results will likely be insightful and well worth your time and money. Bear in mind, however, that it is just a screening test.
>
> http://www.mentalhealth.com/p71.html
>
> If the ten bucks is too hard to come up with right now, then fill out this free bipolar questionnaire:
>
> http://www.psycheducation.org/depression/MDQ.htm
>
> Katia, I’m not speculating that you are, but if it turns out that you are bipolar, then a good place to start your research is by looking at the following document. Don’t be intimidated by the size of the document; just read bits and pieces of it. In particular, begin by scanning the sections that addresses treatment/medication recommendations. Lithium and Depakote are the first-line moodstabilizers recommended in the document.
>
> http://www.psych.org/clin_res/bipolar_revisebook_index.cfm
>
> If you need help, we’re here for you. Problems are just solutions waiting to be found.
>
> -- Ronthanks for taking so much time to reply. I actually did pay that $10 and found it worthless. The test is so general and groups questions together for a yes/no or in between answer, when sometimes it's talking about three different things, but want one answer to it. I found it to be not at all worth the time or money.
the other one I've done on the psycheducation website, but it was the same one only for free; but there's nothing like asking real people for feedback esp. regarding mental stuff that affects behaviour stuff. I'm just trying to get at as many sources as possible to figure this out.While the Serzone seems to be working now - I'm only on 50mg; it was a rough start. I did the whole starter pack and was up to like 400mg a day during the last of the third week. Those three weeks, I definitely got hypomanic. I was getting scared so I stopped it and then within those five or so days, I felt like I was losing my mind. I'd cry and cry and just crash with no logic to it. I felt at times it was the end of the earth and I wanted to rip my skin off. So I'm milking the last of what I have with 50mg a day now for about 11 days. I don't feel depressed; just moody. Like I don't wake up with dread and fear, but feeling like I want to start the day. I'm not sleeping quite as well; but good enough I suppose. Maybe 7 hours a night. It takes me awhile to settle down. Sometimes it does feel like there is a tornado (a small one) in my head.
So I feel like, yes the Serzone is definitely triggering some hypomania; but maybe that's settling down now and that was just a side effect at first and I went too high too quickly.?
But my other concern is, I consider that I've been depressed most of my life; but I've had periods of a lot of energy; irritability, raciness, "manicness". it's gotten me to many different countries, a many intense "affairs"; cycled through jobs. I've been called "passionate, intense, high maintanence, moody, wild, crazy,etc." and normally most boyfriends (from those intense affairs) have told me that they've never experienced such intensity of feeling before with me (like the roller coaster ride alternating b/t high and low). And most of these relationships lasted a short time and ended dramatically and traumatically. I've been called a "drama queen" way more times than I'd like. And I feel like saying, "no I'm not! I just want peace and solitude, I can't help being this way - it's not what I want!". I'm guessing in retrospect that maybe that was some what fueled by bipolar? I've been far too wild and high strung and then depressed and withdrawn and mainly a mix of the two; depression being a clear cut one on it's own at times. Normally when I feel this high strungness, drinking is involved to "tame" it and then it exacerbates it and I make poor decisions and do things I wouldn't do if my judgment was better. I could write a book about the situations I've been in and many people have told me so. I feel the depression stronger at times (really bad at times) has been underlying all of this.So there's my story. Any input?
thanks.
Katia
poster:katia
thread:102831
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030530/msgs/230817.html